#16 Wondering How Gay People, Ya Know, "Do It."

In fact, I started out straight, and just wanted to research the subject. My research has been quite successful (and successional) and should probably only take another 40 years or so to complete. Don't worry straight people. I'm bringing back props, diagrams and video.

#15 Being on T.R. Knight's Side

Everybody loves George O'Malley. Even straight dudes. He's a neat guy. He's a nifty and neat guy. He's like a walking dimple. Ya know? And check this out: he's like, totally gay in real life, right. But on screen he's totally done Ellen Pompeo, Katherine Heigl AND frickin' Sara Ramirez. McDreamy and McSteamy don't even have that record. That's it: I wanna be a gay guy.

#14 "Everybody Loves Raymond"

I'm not gonna lie: I watch it too. But straight people actually enjoy it.

#13 Keanu Reeves

Lucky bastard has made a great living by doin' it with Halle Barry, Sandra Bullock and my ex-wife Charlize Theron on the big screen. But I don't think he could act his way out of a paper bag. File him away under *straight people box office gold*

And someone let him know that "Whoa" was only cool when Joey Lawrence said it on "Blossom", alright?

#12 Unspoken Gay Tension Between Straight TV Characters

Don't ask me why. The straights do it. I just report it.

#11 Watching The L Word For the "Really Interesting Storylines"

Yeah. So do I.

#10 Cuba Gooding, Jr

Show meeeee...
what all the fuss is about.

#9 Having Gay Friends So They Can Say "A Friend of Mine is Gay and..."

Some of my best friends are gay...